Okay, so in Against the Grain I examine the cultural phenomenon of fake wood grain, while in Deal With Me I attempt to explain contemporary art to my mother, which is actually kind of like doing Guerilla Art Behind the Orange Curtain, which itself does share something in common with the time that I Stole Someone Else’s Art, which is not dissimilar to critiquing an art show, which I did in Sampling What?, which could bear some relationship to critiquing a TV show, which I did in Staking the Other, which though it concerns a so-called auteur is not related to Smashing the Hulking Auteur Theory, wherein I could be said to write about “old media,” unlike the forward-looking New Products for Home, Office Make Life Easier! More Relaxing!, which is hard to follow with a comma, but which I nevertheless did follow with Let me Tell you Something: Why I like Movies Better than Art and yet another article about a certain titular subject called Some Thoughts About "New Media" in Quotes, endquote.